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We present for your enjoyment “Smile”, a game which, if nothing else, aims to please!

How to Play

“Smile”, a game originally played only in the smoke filled rooms of “Gentlemans” clubs between “Johns” and women of ill repute, is a rather simple affair. Six to ten men and woman, more or less evenly divided by gender, should seat themselves around a table large enough to comfortably seat all participants. Drape a heavy table cloth over the table with ample enough fabric to reach the floor on all sides. Be sure everyone is well lubricated and in easy reach of the beverage of their choice. You are essentially ready to begin.

Each player should drop their pants (trousers if your reading this is the UK) and the like to their ankles, making them not only a bit exposed but unable to flee without much fanfare and great difficulty. At this point, players should pass a dice from left to right in the hopes of, or in fear of in some cases, rolling a six. Once a six is rolled, the player responsible must drop to the floor, beneath the table and shielded from view, and “do as they wish”. The object of their “doings” is to make one of the players above crack a smile.

Everything goes. Once a player smiles the player below may return to their chair. The “smiler” must consume the contents of one entire beverage (one full beer, a full glass of wine etc.), and the rolling continues to the right of the player just returned from fondling duties.

You may want to add a few rules to the other five numbers on the die. For instance, a roll of one can be made a “social” and so on and so forth. Hell, you may even decide to spice things up a bit more by freeing yourselves of any and all binding fabric situated down in the nether regions. In any event, your bound to turn the world on with your smile; or is that the other way around? No matter. Have fun and do not tell the pope on us.

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